am i supposed to go to disney feeling so god damn sick? why the fuck did this have to happen

hope i’m not fucking miserable the whole time… what a joke life pulled

high school is done forever. time to get a job and work till death. scared—

my throat burns, my head aches, my teeth feel like broken glass, everything just sucks

all i have to ask is: why…

at least tonight everyone got along for the cook out. i’m thankful for that and i got a target gift card with 50$ on it and mykell’s mom got me some things :) she’s so sweet i can’t even stand it!

i need to pick out my clothes

like throwing up. there always has to be something to ruin things for me. i just want to forget about everything, i want to move away. i need to get away from all of these fucking people, i hate every single one of them. i guess marissa will be the only friend i have for now and that’s fine with me, whatever. everyone else just sucks. there’s just no fixing or getting over what’s happened in the past with other friendships, they all tend to move on, and eventually the relationship just fades away. it won’t come back and that’s fine. i’ll start over and make new friends. that’s all i need. but where the hell do i find friends like me?… i don’t want to fucking go to gulf coast with people i just got out of high school with god damn it. i want AWAY from EVERYONE in panama city.

i’m sick as fuck, anxious as fuck.

last day of school is thursday, i don’t even have to show up because i won’t have any exams that day, and tomorrow i have my aerobics exam.

monday i leave for disney world. still need to pack up and get everything i need - sunglasses, those delicious waters from world market, snacks, candy, and a cute little bag to put all of this stuff in.

i need to start packing asap including my swim suit, florida id, and lots of underwear, and some dressy clothes.

AH i’m so excited :D

still debating on if i should wear make-up or not? i mean it will wear off during the day and i’ll look like shit regardless, but should i still try to help that?

i don’t know i don’t know i don’t know